So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
