Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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