So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
