Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
I cut my penus on the lid.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
Randomize