Pregnant stripper...not hot.
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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