So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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