there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
do herpes really smell.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
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