my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
do herpes really smell.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
