we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Randomize
