Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Randomize
