new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
