when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Randomize
