It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Randomize
