Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
