There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
Randomize
