I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Randomize
