My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
