Whod you bang
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
Randomize
