I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
