**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
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