your thong is hanging out like whoa
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
