I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Randomize
