are you still at the devil's house?
Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
