drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
