And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
My vagina just recognized that song.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Randomize