He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
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