What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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