if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
