Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
I'm always down for nudity.
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