Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
i just sent this text using only my big toe
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
Randomize
