Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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