He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize
