Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
one might say we're banned from that church
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
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