real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
