I'm going to jail i love you
it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
