I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
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