He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
