Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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