What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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