Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
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