we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
