I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
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