i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
Randomize
