Slut skills are useful in every country.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
Randomize
