at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Randomize
