Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
