is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Randomize
