Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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