Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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