i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize
